The Two People I Want to Be

I know what you're thinking. I'm going to say my parents or something like that. No. No, instead, the two people I'd like to wake up as tomorrow (other than myself, of course) are Tom Brady and Bobby Flay. Why these two distinquished gentlemen? Well, Tom Brady (a Michigan man, like me!) has won three Superbowls, is good looking, makes more than God, once dated a very gorgeous Bridget Moynahan, and is now sharing a bed with Giselle. Wow. Did someone say Man of the Century? And to think he's still in his prime...in all senses of the concept.

Bobby Flay, on the other hand, is a fantastic chef, has his own TV show (actually, TV SHOWS!), is funny, handsome, and has a smoking hot wife (if you've ever seen Law and Order, she's the blonde. Yeah.)

Men want to be these guys and women want to be with these guys.

Which gets me to my next question. Why wasn't I born cool? You know how they say leaders aren't made, they're born? I think the same thing goes with being cool. It's like athleticism of the personality. There's probably only so much of this I can blame on poor genes eminating from my father's unbelieable uncool-ness (and being unathletic, come to think of it), but I think I'm living proof that uncool-ness comes from the Y-chromosome...much in the same way that my hair proves that balding comes from the X-chromosome.

I feel like I'm becoming George Costanza. Things need to change.