As Promised...

Sorry loyal readers (my parents) for the lack of posting...it's been a busy week of stuff. Anyway, for those of you who don't know, Wednesday night was one of those unforgettable nights...the first time I think I've ever felt like a college kid and (gasp) liked it...

It all started when we won our broomball game.. the first win of the season, and it came in the playoffs no less (OK, the B playoffs, but it was still mighty solid). Here's a picture of the menacing broomball defense I play (I'm the big one in the blue shirt in the back):

Anywho, it is Southwest tradition to go to BTB (Big Ten Burrito for you non- Ann Arbor people) and grab a midnight snack. Gentz and I usually get quesadillas. Anyway, a few others joined us in this tradition, including one Aghogho Edevbie, who had to eat the restuarant's largest single item (this being the "Giant" chimmichanga, an enormous fried burrito, pictured below) per some kind of lost bet or promise (I'm not sure which) Anyway, he had to eat the WHOLE THING, right there.
Yeah, he had to eat that fried child. Anyway, he cruised through the first half of it in 25 minutes. The next uncomfortable fourth was gone within fifteen minutes. Then came the grueling last fourth of the Giant, in between bites, us shuttling between the beverage fountain supplying our competitor with water. But that final damn fourth was a feat of will and concentration, and I have to give it to our gastronomic warrior: he gave it his all; however, it was apparent to all in attendence (including some curious onlookers from the BTB kitchen who whipped out their camera phones) that our man Aghogho wasn't doing too well.
He got down to the last few bites, where every swallow was preceeded with 10 minutes of some of the most painful digesting you'll ever see. Aghogho had one last bite before him and upon staring it down, his cheeks puffed like he was playing an imaginary saxophone. I got out of my seat, turned my back and heard "SPLAT!" It was all over...Aghogho would not be crowned Chimmi-champion on this night. Instead of a trophy (or more important, free Churros for his friends...) all that sat before Aghogho was a pool of fried vomit. Yech! Anyway, we had fun (until we found out we had to clean it up) and comforted Aghogho who sat in disbelief. Truly one of the best nights of college to date...if not the best. Never before has someone puking been so entertaining.

He says he wants to try to attempt the feat again. This time, we'll be ready...with those airplane vomit bags.

PS
I have a few pictures of Aghogho sitting in his own vomit, but due to reader demand, I opted not to post it. They are amazing photos though and if you want to see 'em, just ask.

Happy Easter!

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Big Tuesday

So, my birthday extravaganza was a delight...after the first hour in which my grandmother drilled me for inconsequential details of the processes of my life and my stepmother put on cry face because my father lost patience with my grandmother's berage of questions, concerns, and worries. I did drink 3 glasses of wine in public on my birthday and had a delicious dinner with crab cakes, seared sea scallops, and port. The coolest gift I got? My grandfather's World War II dog tags...I can't wear them, but they are really neat to have.

Anyway, today I got up and went to class, which was a bore...par for the course. My curly-haired confidant Amy Butler called me and asked me to dinner...which got me excited- Hey! It's been a while since a girl wanted to go to dinner with me! Anyway, after an afternoon screening, I took a shower, shaved, cologned, and fiddled with my hair (we're just friends, but a guy still likes to look good in public with a pretty lady.) We met at West Quad and walked over to Noodles & Co. I knew something was fishy when (actually, I knew something was fishy when she asked me out) she insisted we check for seating upstairs prior to ordering at the counter....This would have been fine for a party of 15, but it was just us two...or so I thought. We order at the counter and head to the upstairs seating area where 8 of my friends smiled and shouted "Surprise!"

It was the first surprise party my life's ever seen and I must say, it was a delight. A few scragglers joined us (Cameron and Liza came late) as we talked about the guy I saw wearing capris today, "almost" relationships (apparently there's such a thing), and my impending engagement to Amy...who said she'd marry me if I could produce a Tiffany's diamond engagement ring...don't get me wrong, she doens't WANT to marry me, but would still like for me to buy her a Tiffany's diamond ring. Typical girl.

After dinner, I helped a friend out by participating in a disscussion about campus diversity. I think I have a solid idea on rennovating the idea of affirmative action, ask me if you're curious, I think its a compelling solution.

Then, I went to play broomball against the other half of Southwest. We lost 3-0...IM sports hasn't been kind in the year 2008...

Whew, what a Tuesday...

21 Means, Well, Not What it Should

Again, its birthday season, so I'm really looking forward to that. When I was 18, things were going so good that I thought that by 21 I'd have it all figured out. Who knew that I wouldn't and that I'd really just miss being 18...life is crazy like that.

Gave a small presentation on Carnivale di Venezia (Italian version of Mardi Gras) today in class...I've become a nervous public speaker, especially in another language, so I'm super relieved it's done!

I got my new MacBook Pro (although, I'm writing this with the terminally ill iBook G4 I got when I was in high school). Its pretty neat, with a camera in it and all kinds of cool features. My favorite part is that it looks pretty....is that wrong?

In other news, I lost 5 bucks on a game of Madden (I'm rusty/not as slick as I used to be) and am going to the Pistons/Spurs game tmw night. I have to admit, I dislike both teams, but I'm pulling for the Pistons on this one since the worse the Spurs do, the better the Mavs do (and thusly, the better I feel).

My German visiting scholar TV theory teacher mistakenly says "oftenly" as opposed to just "often." I think we should add it to the dictionary.

So, last night a pretty girl that I was checking out in the union study room saw me checking her out (yes, I have a staring problem). Anyway, I resumed my work and then 20 minutes later she came over to me, smiled a nice smile and asked politely if I was in Poly Sci 209 or something. I stupidly just replied "No, sorry." and let her walk away. I didn't even think that she'd possibly come over with a question she already knew the answer to just to try and talk to me. And instead of playing along and saying "No, but my name is 'Alex,' what's your's?" I shooed her away like she was a hobo asking for a twenty. I oftenly (sounds cool, doesn't it!?) say stupid things, especially when it comes to relating to the opposite sex...why is this!?

I'm 21 years old now...I feel like I'm 14.

Another Good Quote from Class

Sorry for not posting for a while...lots of hw. Anyway, this'll be quick. It's another great quote from screenplay class. It was by a kid who was questioning the believability of one of the screenplays we were reading when he said...

"I mean, come on. A husband refusing a blow job from his wife....that just doesn't happen!"

Totally straight-faced...brilliant. 

Anyway, my 21st birthday is on Saturday...to think it'd turn 21 on the St. Patrick's Day replacement...kind of ironic if you ask me...

So, drink a green one for me. Then go out and get me a present.

Upon Further Inspection...

It appears I have even more hair on my body than I previously thought. In addition to the hair I have on my chest and shoulders (I need to get waxed, pronto), I noticed for the first time that there's hair on my toes. Its not gross or anything, but delicate strands of burnt orange sprouting from my pod digits. I don't get why DNA has to be so cruel. I just want hair on my head and for it to be red and not to leave. I'll be the first person in the world to have gotten hair transplants from my toes to my head. I feel like a circus freak...

A Great Idea from My Father

So, yesterday my dad and my stepmother picked up a girl that is helping them design their new house in Omaha. My stepmother recognized her as "perfect for Alex" and made my dad inquire about her availability, interest, and likes/dislikes. The girl approved of my pictures after my dad sold my sense of humor and my writing talents and supposedly agreed to a meeting when I swing back through America's Heartland in May. Most importantly, my stepmother liked her and gave her the Queen's seal of approval.

This got my dad and I thinking. I said that I wanted to just give up on finding a girl since I can never find anyone I like. Really, the only two girls I've ever been really f0nd of (three, if you attritbute the original Jennifer to Jeanette) have come from my stepmom. So, I told my father that I'd just hire Jeanette to go find me a mate. You know what's crazy? I'd totally trust her to do it.

So, my dad came up with a business in which men hire women to find potential women. It makes so much sense! Women know women sooooo much better than men do. They can see through all the girl BS, they can gauge how a woman really feels, and most importantly, they'd know a good woman when they see one. Granted, I know a good woman when I see one, but since women are so much more exposed to other woman than I am, this only makes sense.

And the best part? I don't have to pay for any of it....my stepmom comes to me gratis.

A Brilliant Idea to Make Class More Palatable

OK, so follow me on this one. Angell Hall, where I have EVERY class this semester is either a sauna or a sub-zero freezer. I'm NEVER comfortable in class. Fear not, fellow Wolverines, I've figured out how to remedy this...

From now on, I propose that every classroom be outfitted with a gigantic hot tub. How great would this be? Class would NEVER be boring again. I could stare (while trying to look like I'm not) at the beautiful girls in their swim wear or spot and make fun of anyone with a third nipple or an embarrrasing birth mark (of course, I'd have to wait till after Lent to make fun of said freak...I'm willing to wait.) It'd be totally relaxing and I'd be incredibly confortable. And no, the teacher would not be lecturing inside the hot tube...since most professors are old people, they'd have to remain outside the watery premises, lecturing from land...no one wants too see old junk...

Of course, this too presents its problems. It might prompt an in-class PDA/make out session with some of my not-so-discreet clasmates. I'm not sure how I'd punish this kind of out burst, but give me time, I'll figure out something...

I'd also now have to get waxed regularly so as to conceal my somewhat out of control shoulder hair (don't laugh, your body's no work of art...) as well as having to be in tip-top shape and work on my tan.

Oh well, I'll manage..

"Professor, could you please turn the jets on high....?"

So worth it.

March is my favorite month

"It's easier for ugly people to find someone because they have no expectations."
-I'm not allowed to tell you who said this. How about you just unscramble the letters of this persons name: zaLi

Anyway, a big blog shout out to Big Bob Mann who underwent an angioplasty today. Get better big guy. Now who am I going to metaphorically violate in a friendly game of H-O-R-S-E?

Omigod Kobe Bryant is good. I watched him frustrate the Mavericks yesterday to the tune of 52 points. I heard our coach, Avery Johnson, said something to the tune of "He was uncooperative with our defense." Um, coach, how 'bout a double team? Yeah.

So, I read a great screenplay-writing book that detailed this guyss biggest pet peeves when reading poorly structured screenplays. I don't agree with EVERYTHING he has to say, but 99% of it was great. I love it when you learn how to do something by learning how not to do it. Now all they need to do is publish a book called "How NOT to Make Love."

My dad would probably tell me: "Um, Alex, that'd be a book about you!" Very funny.

I'm going to wrap up this post the same way it started. By talking about ugly people. I was standing in line at the Connection to purchase some Gatorade and a beautiful girl cut off a fat ugly guy about to take his place behind me. I hate it when people get cutt off...except when I get to stand next to a fine looking lady instead of Norm from Cheers.