Commercials These Days!

So, I'm down in my parents basement (yes, I know I sound like a loser, but I swear to God, women of the world, this is only temporary. Like, as in 6 more days temporary) and I'm watching TV on my 100 inch HD projection television (JEALOUS!? Ok, you're right, I'm in my parents basement) and just saw arguably the most offensive TV commercial I have seen in quite a while:

It is a Dairy Queen commercial in which a little 7 or 8 year-old girl and her mom enter a DQ and order two hot fudge sundaes as the girl abruptly tells the mom to just make it one upon catching a ripe 8 year old male checking her out. The mom and the girl sit down at their table as the mom tells the girl she was surprised she wanted to share the sundae to which the girl responds that she didn't as a waitress delivers two sundaes and gestures to the pre-pubescent young man indicating that he purchased the ice cream for her, ala a guy buying a chick a drink at a bar. The mom shoots her little girl a quizzical look to which the little girl replies wearing an evil, evil smile (and this is the central offense of the commercial):

"It's like shooting fish in a barrel."

I'm boycotting Dairy Queens. 

OK, seriously, I thought the commercial was funny. So there. But I can't believe the ad geniuses of the world would make the dating terrain harder for man(and I do mean MAN)kind. Great, even ice cream commercials enforce a sense of entitlement for females. It's gonna be a whole new generation of ego-driven, crazy ladies who think that men are only here to be toyed with. As if Sex and The City (which I hold in the highest regard) and ABC programming (Desperate Housewives, Grey's) weren't enough. I can't believe America encourages things getting harder for guys!

Which brings me to another point, and if you have female anatomy (which most of the readers of this blog do), beware, this might be unpopular. 

Certain female friends (and my mother and aunt and any female related to me) like to argue with me on the point that it is harder to be a girl vying for a boy than it is visa versa. NOT TRUE! It is so much harder being a boy. This is the classic reasoning behind why it's harder being a girl:

"We have to sit around and wait to be asked!"

Point taken. Tom Petty did once say that the waiting is the hardest part. And while I love Mr. Petty, do remember that he is a heartbreaker. Thus, he is not to be trusted. Listen women of the world, it's so much harder being a boy for this reason alone:

You never have to hear "no!"

Asking is soooo hard! All you guys (gals, actually) have to do is sit around and wait. And while I'm sure it sucks, you don't have to do ANYTHING. All you have to do is WAIT! Go read a book. Learn an instrument. Put on makeup then take some off because much of your gender practices NO restraint and looks like they should be patrolling Hollywood Boulevard. I don't care what you do, but it doesn't take thought. 

For guys? Well, it takes sense of humor, confidence, preparedness, and a thick skin. It takes a keen sense of knowing when the time is right. Being a girl is easy. The worst thing that can happen is, well, nothing happens. And even then, should you have taken my advice, you turn out to be a smarter (the books, instruments), better looking (a better feel for makeup, an underrated quality), and more well rounded woman. Heck, with all the time we've generated for you by making you wait, we should be thanked, whether you've been asked out or not.

What's the worst that can happen in the boy's situation? Only the world's most awkward moment (usually total silence) and the worst word in the English language- "No." I kid you not ladies, it sucks. Try it some time.

Like shooting fish in a barrel? Yeah, we'll see.